June 27, 2016
Honest and respectful communication could be the key to saving your marriage.
We’ve all done it. We’ve kept our mouths shut (sometimes only by clenching our jaws) when everything inside of us is screaming to let our spouse know what we’re feeling and/or thinking.
There are times when you just don’t want to open the can of worms that saying “I think you’re an idiot” or “You’ve hurt me so much – again – that I know I’d be better off without you” would blow the lid off of. Really, what good would saying this stuff do?
It probably isn’t obvious yet what good telling your inner-most thoughts to your spouse can do. BUT not telling them only does one thing – guarantees that your marriage becomes unhappy (if it isn’t already).
Now, I’m not advocating that you tell your spouse every fleeting thought and emotion that goes through your head. What I am suggesting is that if you had been truthful about the first time you didn’t understand why your mate did something, you might know they’re not really an idiot for doing it again now. Or if you had told them how much they hurt you when they said or did xyz, you…
Read more: Speak Up To Save Your Unhappy Marriage
May 20, 2016
If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. ~Wayne Dyer
According to Dictionary.com, gratitude is a feeling of thankfulness or appreciation, as for gifts or favors. Gratitude also been defined as “an estimate of gain coupled with the judgment that someone else is responsible for that gain” by Robert C. Solomon in his book The Passions.
Now if your marriage isn’t exactly blissful and you’re wondering if you can or even want to save it, feeling thankful for it isn’t an easy thing to do. BUT it may be exactly what you need to do.
According to Robert Emmons, Ph.D, gratitude has some serious, science-proven benefits that will change the way you look at the world (which, btw, includes your marriage). In one of his studies, participants who kept gratitude lists were more likely to make progress toward important personal goal.
Yes, “I want to save my marriage” is definitely an important personal goal that could be more easily gained by practicing gratitude.
This doesn’t mean that you need to feel grateful for every argument you have with your spouse. (Although you could be grateful for the learning opportunity the argument gives you, but that’s a…
Read more: Can I Save My Marriage With Gratitude?