- August 19, 2018
Here are 12 of the most important characteristics of healthy co-parenting.
Parenting children is challenging. Co-parenting after divorce can be especially challenging...and anything but healthy.
So what is healthy co-parenting? And how can two people who couldn’t get along well enough to stay married be expected to co-parent like adults?
The norm for child custody used to be that one parent was the custodial guardian and the other parent had limited visitation. This might be every other weekend with extra time during vacations from school, or a similar but limited arrangement.
Today, however, it is common for parents to share custody of the children after divorce. The giant dry-erase board in the kitchen will be filled in according to “Mom’s week,” “Dad’s week” and a slew of co-mingling events defined by the kids’ active lives.
Co-parenting is greatly influenced by the reciprocal interactions of each parent. In other words, if you as the parents are inconsistent and ununified in your parenting, your children will be the ones to suffer.
When it comes to communication, if you don’t know or practice what is healthy, co-parenting will be unnecessarily difficult for everyone involved. It is a commitment that requires empathy, patience, honesty and open communication.
Read more: What Is Healthy Co-Parenting?
- August 28, 2017
You can survive just about anything when you focus on your kids.
Some people have it so easy. They’re actually friends with their ex and so learning how to co-parent after divorce comes naturally and easily for them.
Then there’s everybody else who has ever gotten divorced with kids. Everybody else struggles with how to survive co-parenting because they have to stay in regular contact with their ex and it’s about the last thing they want to do.
Then when their ex finds a new love and introduces this love to their children, their struggles escalate dramatically.
As uncomfortable, complicated and horrible as it feels, there are really only two reasons why anyone has difficulties with figuring out how to survive co-parenting with their ex and their new partner:
- Your ex and/or their new love is toxic.
- You’re not over your divorce yet.
Although it’s really easy to place the blame for all the trouble you’re having at your ex’s doorstep (and in some cases, that’s EXACTLY where it belongs), it takes a very strong person, just like you are, to consider the possibility you’re not quite over your divorce.
You know that your troubles with co-parenting are stemming largely from your need for more healing…
Read more: How To Survive Co-Parenting With Your Ex AND Their New Love