- November 13, 2018
How you parent after divorce has a lot to do with how well you’ve healed from your divorce.
Even divorce can’t excise an unwanted ex from your life if there are children left to be raised. Sole custody vs co-parenting vs parallel parenting -- the child-rearing component can be the most harrowing aspect of a marital split.
Ideally the parting adults would be just that: adults. They would recognize that their personal inability to co-exist in a marriage should not preclude their ability to be good parents. And they would be up for the task of behaving and communicating accordingly.
They would be unequivocally committed to the welfare and happiness of their children, even at the cost of their own comfort and convenience. They would never fight in front of, let alone through their children. And their children would have strong, healthy relationships with both parents
But alas, we know that is far from the norm. Children of divorce grow up steeped in the influences and effects of their parents’ actions. And their parents often don’t recognize their own influence until the damage has been done.
While sole custodyis relatively rare, there are reasons that it is in the best interest of a child. More…
Read more: The 6 Challenges Of Co-Parenting vs Parallel Parenting
- August 19, 2018
Here are 12 of the most important characteristics of healthy co-parenting.
Parenting children is challenging. Co-parenting after divorce can be especially challenging...and anything but healthy.
So what is healthy co-parenting? And how can two people who couldn’t get along well enough to stay married be expected to co-parent like adults?
The norm for child custody used to be that one parent was the custodial guardian and the other parent had limited visitation. This might be every other weekend with extra time during vacations from school, or a similar but limited arrangement.
Today, however, it is common for parents to share custody of the children after divorce. The giant dry-erase board in the kitchen will be filled in according to “Mom’s week,” “Dad’s week” and a slew of co-mingling events defined by the kids’ active lives.
Co-parenting is greatly influenced by the reciprocal interactions of each parent. In other words, if you as the parents are inconsistent and ununified in your parenting, your children will be the ones to suffer.
When it comes to communication, if you don’t know or practice what is healthy, co-parenting will be unnecessarily difficult for everyone involved. It is a commitment that requires empathy, patience, honesty and open communication.
Read more: What Is Healthy Co-Parenting?