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- December 5, 2016
In short, no. Here’s why and what you can do about it.
Getting served with divorce papers out of the blue is without question a WTF moment.
Seriously, how could you ever be prepared for it? Sure your marriage wasn’t perfect, but whose is? And what gives the person who promised they’d love you forever the right to just quit? These and a million other questions are probably running through your mind right now.
Your thoughts are swirling with trying to make sense of the fact that your spouse or soon-to-be-ex wants a divorce and your emotions are just trying to catch up. One minute you’re in shock, the next you’re pissed and then you’re sad. All you’re left with is WTF.
The brutal truth is your spouse has betrayed you – well, at least they’ve betrayed your expectations. We all build our lives on expectations because it’s how we’ve learned to make sense of the world. The problem is we base our expectations on assumptions about other people. And, unfortunately, our assumptions aren’t always correct.
That’s why when an experience challenges or simply proves wrong one of your fundamental assumptions – that your marriage is going to last – your entire world perspective goes into…
Read more: Am I The Only One In WTF Mode?
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- November 10, 2016
Negative thoughts are a normal part of divorce, but you don’t have to suffer with them indefinitely.
Even in the best of times we all have negative thoughts. But when you get divorced the negative thoughts take over. You become trapped in a world of fears. You’re constantly asking yourself, “What if this happens?” And, of course, this is something really, really bad.
The nightmare of negativity and pessimism is constant. You’re bombarded by terrifying thoughts whether you’re awake or asleep and dreaming (that is if you’re lucky enough to get some sleep).
What makes the pessimism so prevalent now when you’re trying to find the strength to heal and move on with your life?
The truth is that all of these negative thoughts are fueled by depression and anxiety. And it probably comes as no surprise to you that divorce triggers depression and anxiety for a lot of people.
The problem is that no matter how well you understand why your mind races after one bit of negativity and fear mongering after another, the simple understanding will never, ever make the thoughts stop. That’s because anxiety changes your brain. It impacts the way you think in such a way that the more you think negative thoughts, the more…
Read more: Why You’re Having Negative Thoughts Post-Divorce And How To Stop Them