- July 31, 2019
Tips to help you, your kids' other parent and your new spouse work together.
Divorce can make life feel unraveled on countless levels. And no one in its sphere is immune to its effects. If you have children and are co-parenting, you know there will be new adjustments as you begin to open your life to new love. And if you plan to remarry, you will need keys to co-parenting that support your children and allow you to move on with your life.
Research shows that children of divorce who spend at least 35% of their time with each parent have better relationships with both parents. They also fare better academically, socially, and psychologically.
The takeaway here is that shared parenting, or co-parenting, should be the goal of divorced parents committed to their children’s highest good. (However, co-parenting isn’t always possible and sometimes it isn't in the best interest of the children.)
Successfully using the keys to co-parenting requires the commitment of the parents to behave as adults. Their primary focus can’t be on their personal squabbles or lingering anger from their marriage.
And if the biological parents can’t co-parent in a healthy way, adding a new spouse to the mix won’t make things any easier.
Read more: Keys To Co-Parenting After You Have Remarried
- July 25, 2019
Answers to the three questions every spouse who’s been cheated on asks.
After discovering your spouse has cheated, and the initial shock wears off, a million questions bombard you. How could this have happened? Why did they do it? What were they thinking? Aren’t I enough? What’s wrong with me? How did I miss the signs? … Marital infidelity is one of the most hurtful things a couple can experience and one of the most difficult to get through.
Yet, getting through it is possible.
Sometimes the best place to start unpacking and answering some of the questions about how you’ll get through the betrayal is to understand why people cheat, how common marital infidelity is and whether a marriage can survive an affair.
What is the main reason for infidelity?
According to anthropologist Helen Fisher, we all have 3 basic drives: the sex drive, romantic love, and attachment to a long-term partner. Ideally, marriage provides a partner who can meet all three of our drives, but sometimes there are other influences that cause a spouse to stray. It’s even possible for us to have our drives met by different people at the same time.
A study published in Journal of Marriage and Family found that people…
Read more: Marriage Rocked By Infidelity? Here’s How To Begin Getting Through It
- July 17, 2019
You can find comfort in these positive and supportive quotes about divorce.
Sometimes in the midst of the struggle to heal from divorce, all you want are a few little tidbits of inspiration. That’s exactly what divorce quotes can provide.
Below is a collection of grief, moving on with life, and divorce quotes to help inspire and comfort you (or a friend). When all you need is a little encouragement to know that you can and will get through the difficulties of your divorce, skim through this collection. And chances are that you’ll likely find at least one helpful quote.
- I still have sadness and complicated feelings about my divorce. But how beneficial is it to keep hanging onto those feelings? If someone lives through an accident, his aim is to become better and healthy. My aim is always to progress - to make better decisions and be a better father, a better boyfriend, a better husband if it happens again. ~Ryan Phillippe
- Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old…
Read more: 135 Divorce Quotes To Help You (Or A Friend) Heal After Divorce
- July 9, 2019
There’s not just one right reason to call it quits.
People have a multitude of motives for wanting to know the reasons for divorce. Maybe they want to understand why their spouse has chosen divorce instead of working on their marriage. Maybe they want to know if what they’re going through in their marriage is worthy of divorce. Maybe they’re just curious about why people divorce in general.
Whatever your motivation is for looking up the reasons people decide to call it quits, you’ll find both research-based answers along with others that will surprise you below.
The 5 Research-Based Reasons People Divorce
Researchers interviewed 52 divorced individuals who had received the Prevention and Relationship Enhancement Program (PREP) while engaged. In 2013, they presented their findings. Here are the top 5 reasons they discovered that lead to divorce:
- Lack of commitment.
According to the research, the number one reason people divorce is a lack of commitment. This means that at least one spouse stopped making their marriage a priority. When a spouse decides to stop making a daily commitment to have a great relationship, misery follows.
For some couples, the estrangement happened gradually. They drifted apart until one of them was unwilling to continue living with an unfulfilling…
Read more: The 5 Most Common Reasons For Divorce (& 5 Very Unusual Ones)
- July 4, 2019
Impossible is only one perspective.
Divorce impacts every facet of your life – how you live, who you are, what you do, when you get to see your kids, and maybe even where you live. So, of course, it’s natural that with all this change you’d feel sad, angry, resentful and uncertain about how to start over after divorce.
Yet, you also know that some people find a gift in all this chaos. They find a way to create an amazing life for themselves after divorce.
Even though, at this exact moment, it seems impossible that you’ll ever feel any better, deep down you know that if other people can figure out how to start over after divorce, you can too.
And you can. You’re not consigned to living with this pain, uncertainty, depression, frustration, anxiety and fear forever. Things can get better.
By following a process, the same process that everyone who’s ever healed and moved on from divorce has followed, you can make things better for you too.
- Work through your grief.
This is the most difficult part of the process. It will require you to come face-to-face with painful memories and emotions. It is also unpredictable. No one can tell you how…
Read more: How To Start Over After Divorce Even If It Seems Impossible