How To Get Through Grief After A Divorce

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April 10, 2018

Healing from your divorce will teach you a lot about yourself – if you’re willing to learn.

It doesn’t matter which side of the divorce decision you’re on or the reason for the decision. The end of a marriage that began with dreams of happily ever after is heartbreaking.

It’s OK to experience grief after a divorce.

Grief after a divorce is profound because the end of your marriage means your entire life must change – whether you want it to or not.

Grief is also incredibly confusing. One minute you’re feeling hopeful about making a new life for yourself. And the next you’re crushed by the fact that your old way of living is over for good.

Of course, you’re also faced with uncertainty about how you’ll cope with creating new rituals and routines, so your life (and the lives of your children) can run smoothly.

You’re shouldering expanded responsibilities now that you’re on your own. And even having to learn how to do new things so your life can move forward in some fashion instead of simply falling apart.

Divorce means that your relationships change too – all of them. Obviously, your relationship with your former spouse changes. But so do your relationships with…

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5 Tips For Dealing With Anger Due To Grief About Divorce

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March 16, 2017

Finally learning how to deal with your anger in a healthy way is an unexpected benefit of divorce.

Almost everyone who goes through divorce gets angry about it.

Your anger may only register as a sense of frustration, or it may be as overwhelming as rage, or something in between these two extremes. But that doesn’t mean that’s how it will feel tomorrow or even in the next moment.

That’s just how healing from divorce is – one unpredictable emotion after another.

Anger is a normal part of any grieving process and needs constructive expression if you’re going to avoid becoming bitter or enraged because of your divorce.

So, dealing with anger due to grief is definitely a skill you need to learn to get over your divorce.

However, before you can really deal with your anger you need to jettison the baggage about it that you’re carrying around. (Yes, you, like everyone else learned stuff that’s not all that helpful about anger.)

Maybe you believe that anger is bad and shouldn’t be expressed. So anytime you feel the slightest twinge of anger you suppress it. The problem with doing this is that the anger will fester and cause you both physical and psychological problems.

Or maybe…

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The 5 Things You HAVE To Do To FINALLY Get Over Your Break Up

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March 20, 2017

Because it takes more than booze and ice cream to truly heal.

It doesn’t matter if this is the first time or the hundredth time – break ups suck.

Logically, you know you’d never want a relationship with someone who doesn’t want you.

But logic isn’t where you go when you get the news that it’s over.

It’s just too shocking! Unbelievable!

How could they dump you after all you’ve done for them? Don’t they realize how much you love them?

You’re indignant.

In a short span of time you’ve already experienced the first two steps of dealing with grief after a break up - shock and anger.

But then something happens – you want to understand why it ended.

You quickly jump to the conclusion it ended because of you. You start thinking that maybe you aren’t good enough, or that you’re unlovable, or that there’s something else fundamentally WRONG with you. It’s the only thing that makes sense – somehow YOU must have screwed up for this amazing person to call it quits.

You start obsessing and over-analyzing your potential faults.

Maybe you ask your ex to tell you what you did to make them dump you so you can change and get the relationship…

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How To Stay Sane When Your Spouse Has Filed For Divorce

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March 7, 2017

Your old life is over. Here's how to start your new one.

When you find out your spouse has filed for divorce, it’s pretty normal to feel disbelief – like there must be some mistake.

There’s no way they would just throw in the towel like that … would they?

Once they confirm that they do want out, you’re overcome with despair.

You wonder if you’ll survive this completely unwanted destruction of your life.

And as reality begins to sink in, your fears start to rise up. In the midst of your despair, you’re overcome with dread because you begin imagining what your life (and your kids’ lives) will become.

All you can see is misery, destruction, and legal bills.

Some of your fears are true.

Divorce will destroy your life, but only the life that was – not the life that’s ahead of you.

And believe it or not, despite how terrifying they are, your fears are actually trying to help you survive your divorce and create a new life for yourself that will really work for you.

Despite the terror they induce, your fears are warnings.

They are the absolute worst-case scenario and alert you to a risk or threat you’re facing that…

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