May 3, 2016
Tossing the invites into the trash isn't your ONLY option.
The trees are leafing out. The flowers are blooming. You can’t escape it no matter how much you want to right now. It’s wedding season and the invitations have started arriving.
Your friends deserve happiness and you wish them well, but why the crap do they need to send you an invitation to their flipping wedding?
Don’t they know that just seeing their invitation sends you into a tail spin? It’s like they’re purposely rubbing salt into your divorce wound. Don’t they realize that their invitation is just another reminder of your failure?
Honestly, no, they don’t understand your pain. Unless you’ve been through divorce, you don’t get it.
So the invitations are still going to come. And you need a way to deal with them a little better than just throwing them away unopened and grabbing a pint of Haagen-Dazs, a bottle of wine and/or Tinder.
Option 1: Decline the invitation. If going to a wedding is too painful for you, that’s OK. Divorce griefis a big deal. There’s no reason to put yourself into a situation that will undermine your healing. You have to take care of you first. Your friend will understand.…
Read more: 4 Divorced-Girl Tricks For Surviving The Wedding Season With Grace
March 7, 2016
Science says all it takes is some belief in yourself.
Starting over again after divorce fills you with a terrifying (and slightly obsessive) set of fears. You’re afraid that your life after divorce can only be worse than your life was before. You hammer yourself with the thought that you failed at being married. And obviously this failure means there’s something wrong with you which, again obviously, means you deserve misery for the rest of your life.
Well, OK, maybe that’s not what your fears about your life after divorce are, but that’s what mine were. As you can tell, I quickly slid into the abyss of self-loathing.
But even with all my divorce depression and self-flagellation, I was also secretly excited about the possibilities my freedom opened up for me – at least sometimes. It was really an immensely confusing time for me.
I found my way out of my fog of misery by slowly changing my opinion of myself. I thought, “Maybe, just maybe I wasn’t unwanted trash because my marriage failed. Maybe I could kinda start believing my friends who said I was wonderful.” And that’s how I found the trailhead for my long trek from divorceback to living an ah-mazing life…
Read more: What You Must Do To Have An Ah-Mazing Life After Divorce