Surviving Infidelity

I Cheated. What Should I Do?

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May 6, 2016

Coming clean is the best thing you can do.

So you’ve cheated and now you’re feeling a mixture of guilt and elation. Elation that it was so fun (and easy). And guilt because you have a spouse who trusts you implicitly.

And so you struggle. You wrestle with whether or not you should tell them because you know if you do, there will be repercussions. You could even lose her/him if you tell them the truth.

So you begin rationalizing … Biologically we’re all wired to cheat and there’s no beating my DNA. Right? It was only one time. They’ll never find out.

But that’s all just game playing. Your struggles with whether or not to tell them mean that you know you should, but that you’re scared.

You’re afraid of letting him/her know you’re not as good a person as they think you are (or maybe even as you thought you were). You’re frightened about their reaction when you do tell. And you’re worried because you could lose your marriage.

Despite your fears, coming clean with your spouse is the best thing for both of you.

Still not sure you want to tell? Then, here are the 3 most important reasons you should:

  1. You had…

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4 Reasons You MUST Tell Your Spouse You Cheated

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October 19, 2015
Tell Your Spouse You Cheated

Even if you're scared, coming clean with your spouse is the best thing for both of you if you want to save your marriage.

Not everyone who has an affair set out with the intention to cheat. Most affairs just sort of happen. That's probably how you wound up in this situation - by accident.

Part of you thinks it was a very happy accident because you've not felt this alive in years. Then there's the other part - the part that's guilt-ridden about betraying the trust of your spouse.

It's the guilty part that's got you wondering if you should come clean with your spouse and admit your infidelity. But it's also got you fearful of the additional guilt you'd feel if you saw (and had to deal with) your mate's reaction.

Most people in your shoes feel trapped and that just sucks.

My guess is that if your spouse made you feel as good as you do with this other person you never would have cheated in the first place. Heck, I'll even bet that your spouse used to make you feel this good, but somehow life got in the way and your relationship changed. And this just adds to the misery you're feeling.…

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