How Does An Unhappy Marriage Affect You?

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March 13, 2017

It’s pretty scary what the stress of a bad marriage can do to you.

You got married because you fell in love and had dreams of living happily ever after. But somewhere along the way marital bliss turned to marital blah or worse.

You might even occasionally toy with the idea of calling it quits or half-heartedly attempt to work on your marriage. Instead of making any significant changes, what you end up doing is staying. You stick it out because the thought of doing anything different is just too big to deal with.

It might seem like this is the path of least resistance, but did you know the impact of your unhappy marriage is greater – a lot greater – than just feeling meh about your spouse? The stress of a bad marriage affects you physically, mentally and emotionally.

How does an unhappy marriage affect you physically?

• Weakens your immune system (source)
• Wounds are slower to heal (source)
• Increases you blood pressure (source)
• Increases your cholesterol (source)
• Makes you gain weight (source)
• Puts you at an increased risk for heart disease, cancer, arthritis, type 2 diabetes, osteoporosis, and arterial calcification (source)
• Causes digestive disorders (source)
• Causes hormone imbalance (source)
• Causes poor sleep (source)
• Shrinks your brain…

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How To End A Miserable Marriage (Without Feeling Guilty At All)

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February 6, 2017

It’s time to stop bullying yourself into staying…

One of the reasons making the decision to divorce is so painful – even when you know that leaving your marriage is absolutely the right thing to do – is that you believe doing so is wrong or bad.

So instead of sitting down with your spouse and having an honest discussion about ending your marriage, you remain stuck in your head (and your unhappy marriage) wondering how to divorce without feeling guilty.

Guilt is an emotional anchor and can prevent you from taking the actions you need to take care of yourself.

It’s tremendously difficult to shed because it’s based on the expectations you have of yourself. Expectations like being an amazing parent to your kids, being true to your spiritual and religious beliefs, keeping the promises you make to your spouse and yourself, and the family and friends who love and respect you.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with these expectations – until you use them against yourself as a reason to feel guilty about even considering getting divorced, despite knowing the only way for you to feel true happiness is to leave your marriage.

So here you are stuck between a rock and a hard place. Paralyzed…

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How To Make An Unhappy Marriage Happy Again

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February 13, 2017

These four tips will help you make your marriage much, much happier!

Living in an unhappy marriage impacts your entire life. The sadness that pervade your home life isn’t something you leave behind when you go off to work in the morning. It’s something you carry with you 24/7/365.

The weight of your misery saps your energy. It decreases your creativity and sucks the joy right out of your life. It can cause you to start wondering, “Is my marriage over?” And your unhappiness can even make you more vulnerable to having an affair.

Allowing yourself to continue just existing in an unhappy marriage is heartbreaking. It’s not what you truly want, much less deserve. You deserve to have an incredible marriage – one that brings you tremendous joy just like yours did in the beginning.

All marriages have rough spots. Rough spots don’t have to mean you’re doomed to spending a miserable lifetime together or that you’re headed for a divorce. The rough spots are just warnings that the two of you don’t pull together as much as necessary to more easily manage them. And because you don’t turn strongly enough toward each other to resolve the challenges you face; the result is that you’re…

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Is Your Bad Marriage Bad Enough To Leave?

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January 16, 2017

Guidance for answering one of the most difficult questions you’ll ever face.

No marriage is perfect – no matter how things may look from the outside. Every couple has struggles and for some the struggles are so great that the only way to describe their union is as a bad marriage.

But there are a couple of curious things about bad marriages.

Some aren’t bad all the time or even most of the time. These are marriages that are situationally unhealthy and are reactions to something specific that happens.

The other curious thing about unhealthy marriages is that bad isn’t the same for everyone. What one couple (or one spouse) calls bad another couple easily accepts as normal.

So what causes a bad marriage?

There’s no single or simple answer here. People who are in unhealthy marriages have all kinds of ways to describe what is the root problem of their relationship woes.

• Betrayals – sexual and emotional
• Too much fighting
• Regularly receiving the silent treatment
• Not talking about problems
• Not cooperating or working together
• Not listening to understand
• Finding blame instead of problem-solving
• Being taken for granted
• Not meeting sexual needs
• Not meeting needs for intimacy
• Keeping secrets
• Passive/aggressive behavior
• Resentment
• Apathy
• Prolonged or repeated…

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