Keeping My Word To My Husband Nearly Destroyed My Life

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January 13, 2016

Surrendering little things you love about yourself will only leave you feeling empty.

The groundwork for my divorce was laid before I ever got married.

I turned 19-years old a month before I met the man I would marry just 10 months later. Back then, I used to love to go out to clubs to dance and have a couple of drinks with my friends (the drinking age was 19 where I lived). But, my boyfriend did not drink. He also didn't dance. So I gave them both up. They seemed like little things to forfeit at the time. And yet this was exactly when I started laying the groundwork for my divorce.

I was raised in a family that would drop a well-placed expletive when we were frustrated or excited. "Sh*t" is a rather multi-purpose word it turns out. But, my boyfriend did not curse. So I gave up that way of expressing myself. At the time, it seemed like just a little thing.

A couple of months before our wedding, I suddenly had a deep knowing that I shouldn't marry this man. (And this was not pre-wedding jitters.) But, you know what? I talked myself out of that deep knowing. In my 19-year-old…

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3 Ways To Make It Through The Holidays When Your Marriage Is Over!

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December 14, 2015

It's time to suck it up, for the kids!

It's the holidays and you think your marriage is over. (Unfortunate timing, right?)

This is supposed to be a time when families come together. When they feel especially loving and close. Except that's not what you're feeling. Being close to your spouse is definitely not what you want. You're done. You've tried and tried, but it hasn't worked. You're through and it's over.

But you can't just drop the bomb that you want a divorce - not now at least. You'd "ruin" the holidays for everyone if you did. You want your kids to experience the magic of the season - not the fear and uncertainty of their parents getting divorced.

So you've chosen to tough it out just a little longer - just until the holidays are over, then you can have the conversation that you're simultaneously dreading and yearning for.

Toughing it out will be tough! This is not an easy decision or an easy path to take. You're asking a lot of yourself and you'll probably find yourself in lots of uncomfortable situations as the season progresses. But you're also giving your children a wonderful gift - one last holiday season with their…

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Getting Divorced? Don't Be Nice

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December 18, 2015

Don't beat around the bush when asking for divorce.

Sheila had been thinking about it for months and she had talked to her girlfriends about it. They were shocked by her admission — she wasn't sure she loved her husband Jeff any more.

Her friends were shocked because, even after all these years, Jeff seemed to be hopelessly in love with her. But.she just wasn't hopelessly in love with him anymore. She'd made her decision; she was going to tell Jeff she wanted a divorce.

This weekend was their twentieth anniversary and they had plans to take a long weekend at a resort without their children. Sheila reasoned that because the resort would be a relaxing setting, they would be alone, and it would provide the time they both needed to talk about divorce.

Their first evening at the resort, they had reservations at a romantic restaurant on the property. After the wine was served, Sheila told Jeff she wanted a divorce. She chose to tell him this first night so they would have plenty of time to talk about the details of the divorce. What she hadn't planned on was Jeff's shock and confusion when she told him her news. After a bit of a…

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The 5 Things Women Want From Their Man

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December 8, 2015

You might be surprised at how familiar these 5 things are.

Most men see women as being completely different from them and therefore almost impossible to understand - much less please.

It's this great divide in understanding that keeps many men from having the relationship they really want with their woman (and their woman really wants with them) - a great one!

In an effort to help relationships everywhere, I'm going to let you in on the biggest secret we women seem to have. I'm going to tell you exactly what we want from a man. (Well, at least what most of us want.)

1. A man she can be proud of and respects
   
   You being comfortable and confident in your own skin and in any situation is important to her. She will be showing you off to her family and friends and you definitely want that to go well. (Note: confident and cocky are two very different things.)
   
   You must have ambition. Not necessarily ambition to rule the world, but ambition to do something important because that shows commitment, discipline, a strong work ethic, and an ability to dream.
   
   She will always be proud of a man who is well-groomed. That doesn't mean…
   

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