Healing After Divorce

Why Healing After A Divorce Is Different For Everyone

Man sitting on a wall thinking about his struggle with healing after a divorce.

Many factors influence healing after a divorce and make it a unique experience for everyone.

When you got married the thought of divorce was a million miles away. And yet now here you are, a million miles away from that beautiful day when everything was possible, reading about healing after a divorce.

Getting over the end of your marriage will be one of the hardest things you’ll ever do. Divorce forces you to reimagine your life and create a new one. It forces you to reimagine your family relationships. It may even force you to reimagine yourself.

In other words, healing after a divorce is a very personal experience.

And it’s precisely because it is so personal, that healing after a divorce is different for everybody. Sure there are some common steps to healing after divorce, but how you experience them and how you proceed through the steps will be unique to you.

Obviously, your personality plays a part in how you will get over your divorce and how long it will take you to recover from it. But there are other factors too that can impact your healing and the time it takes.

Some of the other factors that influence healing after a divorce include:

  • How…

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Why Knowing The Steps To Healing After Divorce Can Help You Heal More Quickly

By using the steps to healing after divorce, this man got over his divorce quickly.

There are definite benefits to knowing what lies ahead.

Divorce is one of the most distressing events you can every experience. Divorce causes pain of such intensity that it’s common to wonder if you can survive it. It’s from this abyss of hurt that you’ll start wondering how to make the aching anguish stop. And you’ll become cautiously curious about whether there are steps to healing after divorce.

And your curiosity about recovering from the end of your marriage is a very, very good thing.

Wanting to know the steps to healing after divorce is a sign of budding courage. It means you’re ready to begin your work to heal your heart instead of remaining mired in the throes of blame and victimhood.

It’s from this place of tentative resolution that knowing the steps to healing after divorce will give you the most benefit.

Benefit 1: Less Anxiety & Stress

Being afraid of the unknown is normal. Having to face the unknown when you’re struggling with the gut-wrenching grief of divorce is downright terrifying.

By knowing what to expect as you put in the effort to heal your heart, you’ll bring clarity to what you’re facing and what still lies ahead of you. And this will…

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How To Get Over A Divorce After A Long Marriage

Man sitting alone and wondering how to get over a divorce after a long marriage.

These 8 suggestions will help you discover how to get over a divorce after a long marriage.

After being married for a while, it’s natural to begin identifying yourself in the context of marriage and family. So, knowing how to get over a divorce after a long marriage would therefore be as unnatural as forgetting your role as wife, mother, husband, father.

If you have been married long enough to start celebrating your precious-metal anniversaries, you may be part of the “gray divorce revolution.” Even if you are still on the road to 25, being married long enough to raise children to adulthood will make a divorce feel much the same as a gray divorce.

According to Pew Research Center, divorce rates from 1990-2015 showed a surprising age-dependent trend. While the divorce rates declined among those 25-39 (-21%), and slightly increased (+14%) for those 40-49, it more than doubled (109%) for those over 50, and tripled for those over 65.

Even though the rate of divorce is still almost twice as high for those under 50 as for those 50 and over, the trend is alarming, if not interestingly revealing.

Sometimes gray divorceis the result of empty nest syndrome. Sometimes it falls to indiscretion…

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7 Things You Must Know About Healing After A Divorce Or Breakup

Man who is visibly struggling with healing after a divorce or breakup.

By keeping these truths about healing after a divorce or breakup in mind, you can heal more quickly.

It may sound trite to say that “no two relationships are alike,” but it’s true. And in the context of healing after a divorce or breakup, the maxim is just as germane.

Give a canvas, paints and brushes to all the students in an art class and tell them to render the same model. Even with the same instruction, the visual interpretations will be as unique as the artists themselves.

And so it is with giving relationship advice. The “experts” can give insight, objective observations, suggestions -- even relevant scientific data. But how you absorb and apply the counsel will be as unique as you are – especially if you’re struggling with feeling unlovable, lost and discouraged.

When healing after a divorce or breakup, it’s important to remember the unique, non-duplicatable nature of yourself and the relationship you’ve just left.

What may work seamlessly for helping one person heal may create a tangled mess for another. And one person may have a remarkable ability to move on and into a new relationship while another may embark on an unforeseen journey as a happy single.

One piece of…

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How To Get Over An Unexpected Divorce

Woman feeling overwhelmed and wondering how to get over an unexpected divorce.

Tips for getting over the practical and emotional challenges of an unexpected divorce.

No one walks down the aisle wishing there were a rewind button. And no one says “I do” while secretly worrying about how to get over an unexpected divorce in the future.

It can seem absurd, if not surreal, to look at your life in review from the middle of a divorce. How did you go from the assurance of a happy life to the gut punch of having it ripped away?

It was only yesterday that the diamond ring was dangled. Now you’ve been served with divorce papers, leaving you to figure out how to get over an unexpected divorce.

It’s bad enough to be forced into a divorce you don’t want. But there is an extra sting, a piercing shock, when you didn’t see it coming. Wham! You’re thinking it’s time to add to the family or renew your vows, and your spouse has one foot and a suitcase out the door.

No matter how you got here or what role you played in the decision, the process of divorce isn’t easy. You will need the best of yourself in the game — alert, prepared, well-advised.

The question of how…

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